babytayebae

I can see a gold halo hugging your crown of curlsWhile black..

I can see a gold halo hugging your crown of curls
While black roots of doubt dig into the nape of your neck
When I reach to pull them out
I suddenly lose sight of them
And my fingers pass through

I know he'd want me to be taken care of and I really have be..

I know he'd want me to be taken care of and I really have been. My friends here are pretty incredible.

Thanks for bearing with me through my un-horny era. I'll get..

Thanks for bearing with me through my un-horny era. I'll get back into it soon. Promise. My Saturn Return is almost over!

I wonder if his family found his OnlyFans account that he fo..

I wonder if his family found his OnlyFans account that he followed me on. I wonder if that's how they kinda knew who I was, or if they knew me we a partner, or a friend, I was too afraid to ask. I haven't checked to see if his account is on here. I don't want to yet.

Either way, I know he's smiling at me. I made his mom smile ..

Either way, I know he's smiling at me. I made his mom smile a lot and she was his idol. I made sure she knew that too.

Lately I've been feeling very heavy, like the weight of his ..

Lately I've been feeling very heavy, like the weight of his loss is hanging off my neck and in the middle of my chest. Is it the loss or is he trying to tell me something?

I've been hiding away and trying to create in the smallest p..

I've been hiding away and trying to create in the smallest possible way just to get through. A bunch of the jewelry I've made has sold which is really cool! I gotta start making more, I guess.

I keep telling myself to just keep breathing, just keep goin..

I keep telling myself to just keep breathing, just keep going forward. Eventually, I'll get on the other side. Everything ends, the good and the bad.

This has been.... Uh ... The worst eclipse season ever? I'd ..

This has been.... Uh ... The worst eclipse season ever? I'd rather have been anyone else other than me this past month. How was yours?

These hippie feet are defrosting y'all

These hippie feet are defrosting y'all

Finally got these other ones edited. Star seems to be a pret..

Finally got these other ones edited. Star seems to be a pretty decent photographer.

Death is the only change that lasts forever But somehow I th..

Death is the only change that lasts forever

But somehow I think you'll find a way

To live forever in the eyes

Of those that love you🖤

February 2025

Your hands built *wonders*And I'll never shake the feeling o..

Your hands built *wonders*

And I'll never shake the feeling of them holding me inside of stars

While I cried for things I couldn't change

And I guess I'll keep on goingCause you'd want that tooI'll ..

And I guess I'll keep on going

Cause you'd want that too

I'll cherish the prints you left on my heart

And all the little things in my life you touched

And I guess I'll keep on goingCause you'd want that tooI'll ..

And I guess I'll keep on going

Cause you'd want that too

I'll cherish the prints you left on my heart

And all the little things in my life you touched

So I'll throw acid in your graveBecause I know you'd want th..

So I'll throw acid in your grave

Because I know you'd want the worms eating your flesh

To trip balls while doing it

I keep thinking this is a little jokeThat you're going to wa..

I keep thinking this is a little joke

That you're going to walk through some doors

And chuckle your laugh

Because nothing deserves to be taken too seriously

Including something as silly as your own life

You had dinner with the Yakuza You stole an idol from a cult..

You had dinner with the Yakuza

You stole an idol from a cult!

And that's just supposed to be over?

I never get to talk to my lover again?

I mean, you were supposed to fall off a mountain in Thailand..

I mean, you were supposed to fall off a mountain in Thailand

Or contract an unheard of parasite in South America

Not crumple on accident like a flame going out with a slight breeze

I wanted so much more time with youTime to get lost in place..

I wanted so much more time with you

Time to get lost in places neither of us knew

Time to giggle about special shapes

Time to sweat through a bottle of sunscreen and not notice

I asked - I couldn't even see your faceSo I pushed off your ..

I asked - I couldn't even see your face

So I pushed off your hat and you held me

Dazzed under dazzling stars in the desert

High as a kite I danced and danced and danced around youAs y..

High as a kite I danced and danced and danced around you

As you laughed like a man I wanted to love

And I landed right in front of your mouth

For Jean-Leon MagnottoI remember it so perfectly, that momen..

For Jean-Leon Magnotto

I remember it so perfectly, that moment I asked

If I could kiss you

I call this shoot, Pillow Talk

I call this shoot, Pillow Talk

He told me I looked so pretty 🥰

He told me I looked so pretty 🥰

Super moody pics. Excited to share them with y'all. Thank yo..

Super moody pics. Excited to share them with y'all. Thank you for sticking with me through this entire situation. It means so much 🧡

Alright, I got some new photos for y'all. My friend wanted s..

Alright, I got some new photos for y'all. My friend wanted someone to practice taking photos on. ☺️

Here is the obituary for an incredible man, if you'd like to..

Here is the obituary for an incredible man, if you'd like to remember him a little bit with me. Jean-Leon was also the sweetest Dom I'd ever encountered; his catch phrase being, "I'm going to take you apart and put you back together the right way," and he meant it because he was a 2nd degree black belt in Jujitsu. I don't let many people dom me, but he made me feel so safe. He made everyone he met feel safe. I'm honored I got to call him a lover and a partner even though I have to find someone else to go to Asia with.

https://www.dignitymemorial.com/obituaries/fairview-park-oh/jean-leon-magnotto-12249855

I feel like my head is surfacing above water and I'll get back to regular posting soon. Thank you for sticking with me right now. 💜🧡

It's weird not being able to post pics of him on here, maybe..

It's weird not being able to post pics of him on here, maybe I'll link the obituary when his brother releases it and y'all can see how wonderful he was to everyone he knew.

We've come to the end of my scheduled posts and I'm coming a..

We've come to the end of my scheduled posts and I'm coming at you with some grief.

I didn't know you were dead when I took these pictures. You would've loved them and the way you could really see the triangle of my underboob. You loved my body and I loved yours. I love you, Jean-Léon. Rest in absolute radicalness.